Hello Danzoman welcome to iMore!!!
Let's answer some of those Questions:
Is there anyway to have the notes app share between two devices like calendar? Like for instance my wife adds something to her Christmas list and it syncs to my iPhone.
For Notes I think Evernote is the platform of choice, it supports all the major platforms and syncs flawlessly ... Did I mention it's free?
Also is there a way to directly access an app from the lock screen? For example. I get a text and the alert pops up, can it be set up to go directly into iMessage on unlock? I am using touch I'd btw.
If you swipe the notification when you unlock it will take you directly into the app that sent the notification
One last thing. Regarding usage. Is there an app that will let me know what apps in particular are draining my battery/causing wake locks etc and also desperate the screen on time?
Best part about iOS is that it is more sandboxed than Android, you won't need to hunt down wake locks etc, for me I just trust the system and have no issues, that's the beauty of iOS 99% it just works ;-)
Again welcome to iMore!