what software to choose

[jesusman]

Hi, I have an iPhone 6 plus and am looking to get a software that allows me to spy on my wife who also has an iphone 6 plus. I see so many different software options available but really do not know where to start.

I also want to check deleted internet pages and text messages so i need a great software for that also, any help would be greatly appreciated, thanks..

 

[BreakingKayfabe]

I've been spying on your wife already. So no need.

 

[finn5975]

You came to the right place!!! Tonight around bedtime, turn on your phone. Then, log into the Apple Store App. Do a search on Tinder. Download the App. Go into the App and create a new profile. Once every thing is set up, put your phone down.

By now your wife has fallen asleep. Pick up her phone and start spying. Once the dog barks and she wakes up to see you spying on her phone, she will probably begin a fight with you and ultimately leave you for being a spying creep who sought out spyware on a social forum.

At that point, get your phone, log back into Tinder, and search local women to fill the vast amount of free time you will now have.

You're welcome!!!!!!!

 

[iEd]

I've been spying on your wife already. So no need.

LMAO!!!!!!


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[anon(4698833)]

It's been a while, but I think I can help you...follow these instructions very closely, as it can be dangerous:

What you'll need:

- 4 bun length hot dogs (100% beef is always preferred)
- 9 orange tic tacs
- 2 pieces of plane green construction paper
- 1 cup of celery
- A large kite shaped like a dragon or a butterfly
- 200 feet of string
- 15 sparklers (I prefer to use gold, but you can use any color you find)
- A thimble full of Boars Head Honey Mustard

...to start, lay out your kite flat and make sure that there are creases in the material...this is very important later. Mash up the tic tacs in a small mixing bowl, adding the thimble of honey mustard until you have a nice frothy mixture (you can add heavy cream if you're not getting a good consistency).

Coat the hot dogs with this creamy mixture, then tie them (making sure not to break the hot dog) to the kite (using approximately 20 feet of the collected string). Do it in a manner that will allow for a good weight balance.

Take a break and eat the celery...do not dip it in anything though, just straight, raw celery. Enjoy it's delicious bitter flavor.

Connect the remaining 80 feet of string to the kite and then place the sparklers on the kite in a way to celebrate this monumental occasion. Don't worry, it's almost time to get this party started!

Before you attempt to fly the kite, light the sparklers so the spectacle is majestic...nobody is impressed with a normal kite these days, but a dragon/butterfly kite with hot dogs and sparklers? You're about to be a rock star son! Once the sparklers are erupting in beautiful glory, launch this beast into the air...you will now learn that your kite is on fire, and the hot dogs are keeping it from flying anyways, and they are burning, and they smell rancid because you put honey mustard and candy on them before hand...disgusting.

After you clean up your melted plastic kite and burnt hot dog mess...go home, and take the two pieces of green construction paper. Write "I want a divorce" and put a signature line below it on both sheets, then have her sign one and you sign the other one and now you guys have a copy for yourselves and you can just move on...maybe work on that kite again, I don't really care.

Good luck Jesus!

 

[plantemichel]

Seriously People's are sick


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[HankAZ]

Seriously People's are sick

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But they're good for a morning chuckle.

 

[JakePleasants]

It sounds to me that she simply doesn't know her place in the world or the marriage. Tell that lesser human being that she came from your rib and that she is there merely to serve you. If she expects to be allowed to keep spreading her legs to such an upstanding, good, Christian man, then she'd better hand YOUR phone over the second you say she should. You're the man and you own her, therefore whatever she possesses is really yours. Good luck, buddy. If only there were more real men like you and Warren Jeffs around, our country would be in great shape.

 

[jnew619]

It's been a while, but I think I can help you...follow these instructions very closely, as it can be dangerous:

What you'll need:

- 4 bun length hot dogs (100% beef is always preferred)
- 9 orange tic tacs
- 2 pieces of plane green construction paper
- 1 cup of celery
- A large kite shaped like a dragon or a butterfly
- 200 feet of string
- 15 sparklers (I prefer to use gold, but you can use any color you find)
- A thimble full of Boars Head Honey Mustard

...to start, lay out your kite flat and make sure that there are creases in the material...this is very important later. Mash up the tic tacs in a small mixing bowl, adding the thimble of honey mustard until you have a nice frothy mixture (you can add heavy cream if you're not getting a good consistency).

Coat the hot dogs with this creamy mixture, then tie them (making sure not to break the hot dog) to the kite (using approximately 20 feet of the collected string). Do it in a manner that will allow for a good weight balance.

Take a break and eat the celery...do not dip it in anything though, just straight, raw celery. Enjoy it's delicious bitter flavor.

Connect the remaining 80 feet of string to the kite and then place the sparklers on the kite in a way to celebrate this monumental occasion. Don't worry, it's almost time to get this party started!

Before you attempt to fly the kite, light the sparklers so the spectacle is majestic...nobody is impressed with a normal kite these days, but a dragon/butterfly kite with hot dogs and sparklers? You're about to be a rock star son! Once the sparklers are erupting in beautiful glory, launch this beast into the air...you will now learn that your kite is on fire, and the hot dogs are keeping it from flying anyways, and they are burning, and they smell rancid because you put honey mustard and candy on them before hand...disgusting.

After you clean up your melted plastic kite and burnt hot dog mess...go home, and take the two pieces of green construction paper. Write "I want a divorce" and put a signature line below it on both sheets, then have her sign one and you sign the other one and now you guys have a copy for yourselves and you can just move on...maybe work on that kite again, I don't really care.

Good luck Jesus!

Wtf lmao

 

[plantemichel]

Seriously jesusman Only jealous person needs that


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[tigerinexile]

Jesusman -

Jesus, man, that doesn't sound very Godly.

***

Sorry, couldn't resist.


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[tpags]

I think you need a new wife not new software.

 

[JakePleasants]

I think you need a new wife not new software. ����

No, she needs a new husband.

 

[BreakingKayfabe]

I think less people should be getting married.

 

[TLD1]

No, she needs a new husband.

X2